Hear Us Out: Arguments Between Baseball Umpires And Coaches Must End In Make-Out Session

Baseball is America’s pastime. We all know there is nothing better on a hot day than watching the boys of summer. However, we’ve noticed the tension between managers and umpires needs to be pierced. It’s pretty obvious it’s time for on-field arguments between the two to end in a make out session.

The sexual tension between a manager and an umpire has been obvious for over a hundred years, but now it’s time to get passed that smooching barrier. Still, baseball’s unwritten rules have frowned upon infield frenching. This is an old school mentality that needs to be done away with, like not doing home run trots, or not flipping your bat-penis.

The MLB is always looking to speed the game, and what better way than getting to the point? Why else would managers and umpires spend all that time yelling, kicking dirt, and eye fucking? Just throw down your hates, and lock those lips! Our numbers show this should increase the speed of play by a very sexy and steamy hour.

In extremely horny situations (which are common), an umpire can throw himself and the manager out. Then, they can both hit the showers together.