Catcher’s Mixed Signals Lead To Stolen Kiss

In an unforced error last Wednesday, Tampa Bay’s pitcher’s mixed signals to the catcher lead to a stolen kiss. “I couldn’t tell what he wanted me to do. Take it fast? Make it spitty? Slide it?” said the pitcher, noting how confusing, but sexy, the whole thing was.

The stolen smooch happened after the baserunner mistook signals from the catcher that were meant for the pitcher. “I thought we had a connection. A love connection,” said the baserunner, who stole two bases, and a kiss. 

No one has stolen a kiss in the MLB in over 70 years when Ted Williams stole a base, was called safe, and coyly kissed the second baseman on the cheek. Officials are saying that the stolen kiss will stand in the records, marked as a “ * ” in their stats. 

“It’s so historical to see a rare, romantic mixup like we saw today,” said one fan, noting how happy he was that his son was able to witness the game. The kiss, which lasted eleven seconds, marks the second longest kiss of all time, after the Red Sox and Yankees “will they, won’t they” kiss in 1929. 

“Maybe, in some way, this is what I wanted,” said the catcher. The mixed signals continued as the baserunner slid past the catcher, stealing home, and his heart. The mixed signals continued after the game when the pitcher told the baserunner that he was still playing the field.