Entire World Way Too Scared to Tell Maxx Crosby He’s Spelling His Name Wrong

Maxx Crosby is quickly carving a legacy for himself as one of the most feared players in the history of the NFL. His aggressive tendencies plus looking like an ex-con pirate murderer makes anyone who crosses his path think twice.. Which really begs the question: who will risk their life and tell this man that he has seriously misspelled his own name?

Those who have attempted have not only failed but have met dire consequences. Former Raider Derek Carr questioned the spelling in 2019 and Crosby responded by shoving Josh Jacob’s entire head up his own ass without breaking eye contact with Carr. Once-promising head coach candidate Rich Bisacscia apparently once pronounced Crosby name with one ‘x’ and that made Crosby free kick his coach in the groin.

When an anonymous petition arrived from the city of Oakland telling Raiders owner Mark Davis to tell Crosby of his mistake, Davis came to one fitting conclusion: he had to move the entire team to Las Vegas.

“We warn every player who enters the facility not to approach Maxx regarding the two ‘x’ oversight,” said Raiders owner Mark Davis, “the only person who has ever reached him was John Madden, who told Maxx to correct the spelling to Maxxx, which he liked. So Maxx decided to spare his life.”

Maxx is a throwback player like Dick Butkus and does anyone remember the last time someone laughed at Dick’s full name? 

We do – we’ve never seen a man ripped in half quite that fast. 

It’s an honor to see Maxx carry the NFL’s legacy that way.