Racehorse Disowns Son For Pursuing Dressage

Former racehorse and local hero, Blackfoot Delight, formerly disowned his son, Pancake, for rejecting the world of racing in favor of the art of competitive horse dancing known as “dressage.”

The announcement came after Blackfoot Delight discovered Pancake was skipping his race lessons to sneak off to dressage classes with the other neighborhood fillies. “A son of mine doesn’t dance around, he puts a small man on his back and runs in circles,” Blackfoot Delight stomped on the ground to his stable mates.

Though Pancake’s father, who almost won the Triple Crown in 2015 after winning the Belmont and Preakness Stakes, disagrees with his son’s career choice, Dressage experts say Pancake is one of the sport’s rising stars.

“He could be the next Salsa, Cherries Jubilee, or Do-Re-Me-Fa-So-La-Te-Do,” says Pancake’s tough-but-fair instructor, Delores Newsome. “I’ve never seen any of my students execute the half-pass into a canter, plus pirouette, as elegantly as him.”

Pancake’s talent for horse dancing, however, has failed to win over his gruff and traditional father.  “If Pancake doesn’t follow in my hoofsteps, he should at least make the dignified choice to become a workhorse,” Blackfoot Delight whinnied. “Otherwise he’s glue to me.”

At press time, Pancake is poised to win the Olympic gold medal, though his father believes it will be much less masculine to wear around his neck than a rose-covered garland.