Study: American Football Gaining Popularity Among Britain’s Most Dogshit People

After 15 years of NFL games in London, American football is finally growing in popularity amongst Britain’s most dogshit people.

According to a new study published in the renowned sociological journal, “Trashbag Populations,” researchers from the British Council found that America’s most popular sport has gained footholds in the likes of staunch Brexiters, pub rats, racist hooligans, chavs, as well as several royals.

“These are the worst people the UK has to offer, and they just can’t get enough of the NFL,” said lead researcher Delphine Buchanan. “We find they’re attracted to the brutality, misogyny, and medical conspiracies embraced by the league’s most famous players.”

Interviews with British NFL fans seem to corroborate these findings. “Britain needs more concussions and jiggly jugs in our sports, yeah?” yelled one man in a tracksuit from the back of a police car after having headbutted an innocent bystander while wearing a Jaguars helmet.

“Pretty sure Churchill was a Lions fan,” echoed a nearby NFL supporter in an Aaron Rodgers jersey, while urinating on a phone booth. “And he never got no COVID vaxx either. That’s some fat cock to snog, innit?”

Researchers have also noticed a sharp increase in stabbings, pick-up truck sales, and requests for watered-down beer among the country’s most pink-toned individuals. Officials have contemplated taking action against the league to curb the influence American trash culture has had on these vulnerable citizens.

Asked why he believes the NFL has spread in popularity amongst certain Brits, London Mayor Sadiq Khan said, “Karma for giving the world Piers Morgan, I suspect.”