Panthers Replace Bryce Young With Ginger-Piece-Of-Shit

The Carolina Panthers have seen enough from former #1 overall pick Bryce Young and are looking to level-up the position.

“It’s high time we upgrade behind Center,” said Panthers head coach Dave Canales. “We’re sitting Bryce and starting ‘Ginger-Piece-of-Sh*t’ this weekend.”

Who IS this ‘Ginger-Piece-Of-Sh*t’? 

Sports Riot has learned and is reporting that his God-given name, in a previous life, was Andy Dalton. His new born-again-name was anointed to him in 2023 when he was baptized in the name and loyal worship of the Carolina Panthers. 

Having changed his name, logo, and location more than once before leaves many around Panthers HQ wondering if he can be trusted better than the unanimous trash that was Bryce Young.   

“I want to be clear — his given-name is not a reflection of who [Andy Dalton] is as a human-being. In fact, he volunteers, is an excellent role model, family man, and is an active member of the church of Cam Newton,” said coach Dave Canales. “No, his name is purely an assessment of [Dalton’s] quarterback play. Let me be clear, he’s a complete ginger-piece-of-sh*t. And he’s… AN UPGRADE!”