Patriots Attempt First All Drone Roster

The Patriots always seem to find themselves one step ahead of the competition. Now after 20 years of unmatched success, the six-time Super Bowl champions are looking for help from a machine made for war by implementing the NFL’s first all drone roster. 

“They’re good on special-teams, good on defense, and especially good on offense and attacking the other side,” said coach Bill Belichick speaking on the drone’s on-field versatility. 

Other teams have raised issue with the new roster additions including Ravens coach John Harbaugh, who expressed concern over the drones’ ability to spy on his team and believes they should be banned from the NFL.

Belichick’s new additions are just another example of how he is one of the game’s greatest innovators and is always thinking outside the Geneva Convention. However, the 22 drones drafted out of Lockheed-Martin are still susceptible to rookie mistakes just as much as any other first-year pro. Three drones were recently suspended for being late to a team meeting after they accidentally routed themselves to Yemen rather than Foxboro.

Despite the glitches, many of Belichick’s drones are proving themselves to be durable football players as no drone has lost time from a concussion this season.