Shot-Putter’s Olympic Dreams Only A Stone’s Throw Away

With a tremendous heave clearing the shot nearly 18 meters in the Olympic qualifier, Nordic shot-putter Johan Strømstad found himself a mere stone’s throw away from representing his country in the Olympics. 

Unfortunately for Johan, he’s not the only stone-thrower a stone’s throw away from throwing stones in the Olympics. Strømstad is neck-and-neck with bitter rival, Thorleif Hagen, who’s last shot edged Stromstad out by just three centimeters! Which large man will throw the heavy stone further? Will Strømstad ever make it to the Olympics? Or will Thorleif crush his dreams like a small boulder hurled across a field to land on a child’s dollhouse? 

Tune in this Wednesday at 3:00 AM to find out, because literally anything is better than watching another NASCAR race.