Articles

Apology From Our Editors: Lou Gehrig Didn’t Die From ALCS
We no longer consider ourselves the luckiest people on the face of the earth as The Sports Riot editorial team would like to issue a sincere correction regarding a long-standing

Cubs Honor Ryne Sandberg By Not The Winning World Series This Season
Following the death of Hall of Fame second baseman Ryne Sandburg in July, the Cubs decided to dedicate the 2025 season to honoring old “Ryno’s” legacy. The entire organization, in

Paul Skenes Youngest to 200 K’s And 200-Loss Season
2025 has seen its share of bizarre stats, including four players with four-home-run games, a catcher vying for the home-run title, and a pitcher-slugger who could take his third consecutive

Report: Shortstop Spends Countless Hours Looking For Shortstop Base
Rookie shortstop Cal Vega of the Everett (WA) Aquasox has spent significant time this season searching for what he calls the “shortstop base.” Vega, who began playing late in high

Hear Us Out: Do Away With Catchers And Just Let The Ball Hit The Ump
We’ve all been there: bottom of the 6th, down $80 betting on the jumbotron hat game, home team losing by 4 and the ump calls an obvious slider down the

Stadium Vendor Unsuccessfully Attempts To Start ‘Hot Dogs!’ Chant
Seen but not heard. That’s the unspoken credo of the hot dog vendor. Get the meat to the people without disrupting the game. Unless you’re Ed “Big Dog” Miller, it’s

Second Baseman Wondering If He’ll Ever Get Promoted to First Baseman
When Cincinnati Reds second baseman Nick Gonzales gazes at first baseman Spencer Horwitz, he doesn’t see a double-play anchor. Nor does he see an effective leadoff hitter. When Gonzales looks

Stephen Miller Physically Restrained By Staff As Venezuelan Little League Team Takes Field
Trump adviser Stephen Miller had to be physically restrained by aides Saturday after catching a glimpse of Venezuela’s Little League World Series team taking the field. Witnesses say Miller began

Baseball World Stunned As Orioles Throw Very First No-Pitcher
Looking to stop the most recent skid in what has already been a challenging season, the Orioles have begun running a series of devious gambits. So far these have included

MLB Trade Deadline Passes With Liberation Of Only Three Rockies
The July 31st MLB trade deadline came and went. And with it, the great hope of family and friends turned to deep sorrow as only three Rockies were freed from

Vlad Guerrero Jr. Furious To Learn He’s Being Paid In Stupid Canada Money
On April 17 of this year, power hitting Vlad Guerrero Jr. signed a record-setting 14-year, $500 million contract extension with the Toronto Blue Jays, including a reported signing bonus of

BREAKING: Turns Out Baseball Was Invented In Tibet; America Invades
A new study out of Vanderbilt, claiming that Tibet invented baseball, shocked the White House and left the U.S. with no other option but to invade. United States military fired

Justin Verlander And Kate Upton Have Second Child Delivery Clocked At 98 MPH
Justin Verlander and Kate Upton welcomed their second child earlier this month, with the delivery reportedly clocking in at 98 MPH, the fastest recorded in the StatBirthCast era. Verlander, labored
