Articles

Opinion: It’s Good That Nike Is Fat-Shaming The Athletes For Once
Athletes have long awaited this day. The day when Nike, the premier sports apparel brand, stops catering to the lazy, out-of-shape “athlete” with nauseating motivational ads and oversized mannequins. The

MLB Groundskeeper Almost Finished Watering Dirt
Reports out of Camden Yards indicate Orioles head groundskeeper Gil Zahradnik and his six-man crew are just about done watering the dehydrated dirt between innings, providing the hungry dirt with

Miami Marlins Finally Hire First Orthopedic Surgeon
After 27 years in Major League Baseball, the Miami Marlins have finally hired the franchise’s first orthopedic surgeon. Dr. Kenneth Brookfield will now be responsible for diagnosing players’ injuries. In

Bored Baseball Fans Call For Newer, Stronger PEDs
Nostalgic baseball fans longing for the days when the sport used to be exciting staged a protest outside of Major League Baseball headquarters today, calling on the league to fund

College Baseball Team Dies After Staying Hungry All Season
A Division II college baseball team came hungry and stayed hungry all season long, resulting in the deaths of twelve promising athletes. “Those boys were starving for action and to

Athlete Makes Up For Troubling Allegations With Stellar Season
In a heartwarming redemption story, a star studded Houston Astros roster claims to make up for their regrettable on and off-the-field behavior with a stellar statistical season that will help

Good Seats Wasted on Bad Son
A father of three adult sons announced today that the luxury box seats that had been gifted to him last minute by a former colleague had been completely wasted on

Pete Rose Wins The Over On How Long He’d Be Kept Out Of The Hall Of Fame
Former baseball player and current gambler, Pete Rose, added another big win to his legacy by successfully betting the over on how many years would go by without him being

Heartwarming: MLB Player Cites ‘The Sandlot’ As Inspiration For Releasing Ferocious Dog On His Neighbor’s Kids
Speaking to reporters in the locker room after throwing his second no-hitter of the season, Los Angeles Dodgers’ pitcher Dexter Robinson discussed many of the events that have shaped him

The Top 10 Deadest Athletes Who Used To Be Alive
10) Lee Hartman (hockey) – To honor Hartman’s bright and fiery death, the NHL implemented “The Hartman Rule,” which mandated all future champions must wear protective rubber gloves before lifting

Coach Likes to Think of Himself as Abusive Father to Players
Behind every great athlete is a great coach and an even greater human. For a local little league football program, that man is none other than Jack Hanson, whose gift

Miami Mayor Promises At Least Three More Fish-Themed Sports Franchises By 2029
Miami Mayor Fernando Garcia was re-elected to a second term on Tuesday, defeating Republican challenger Tomás Regalado by a wide margin. Many believe Garcia owes his victory to his campaign

Where Are They Now?: The Champion 1953 Yankees
In 1953, the New York Yankees won their 5th consecutive World Series, a record that still exists today; we caught up with some of the players from the team to
