Articles
Hear Us Out: More Chainsaws In Texas Team Logos
I think we can all agree that the most famous thing about Texas is the legendary “Texas Chainsaw Massacre.” It’s literally all the state is known for, as far as
Report: Football Finally Receives FDA Approval
After over 100 years of research the FDA has finally given the go-ahead and approved Football. After initial trials dating back to the 1900s the game’s side-effects were much too
Allegiant Stadium To Stop Serving Cocaine After 3rd Quarter
The Las Vegas Raiders, committed to both excellence and the safety of fans, have informed guests at Allegiant Stadium of their newest policy. Moving forward, Allegiant Stadium will stop serving
7 Objects You Should Never Ejaculate on During the National Anthem
Over the past few years there have been a lot of questions of what you can and can’t do during the national anthem. We’re here to help–here are 7 things
Aww! Meet Andy Reid’s New Emotional Support Sandwich
Sorry, spicy chicken nuggets, but it’s chopped brisket that has the football world head over heels as Kansas City Chiefs head coach Andy Reid debuted his adorable new emotional support
Analysts Say Team Can Avoid Elimination by Winning Game
With the big matchup just days away, leading sports analysts have clearly done their homework because they are confidently telling viewers that one of the teams can avoid elimination by
How’d That Happen? Smarter Team Loses College Football Game
In what can only be described as an upset of great magnitude, our Harvard Crimson Football team lost to Florida State 49-0, despite Harvard holding a superior edge in academic
God Struggling To Come Up With Quests To Keep Tim Tebow Busy
After turning to his Heavenly Father for the umpteenth time for guidance after getting cut from the Jacksonville Jaguars, Tim Tebow has exhausted nearly all of God’s quests to keep
Challenge Flag A Real Blow To Ref’s Self-Esteem
As an NFL official, Jerome Boger expects the rulings he makes on the field to be just that, official. For that reason it was a real blow to his self-esteem
Even Bird-Watchers Not Interested In Falcons Game
Several of Georgia’s most prominent bird-watchers admitted they had a tough time maintaining interest during last week’s Falcons games, despite normally enjoying hours of tedious spectating. The group, who scheduled
Poetry: This Football Coach Is Using War As A Metaphor For Football
In what could only be described as a soliloquy destined to be immortalized in the annals of sports history for centuries to come, local Mason High School football coach and
Bears Fan Too Drunk On Meat To Know They’re Losing
Smiling and laughing while wolfing down another sizable stack of ribs, Bears fan Arnold Boury was reportedly too drunk on meat to realize his team was getting shellacked during last
Department Of Defense Asks Ray Lewis To Stare Down The Taliban Through Zoom Calls
As U.S. forces finish their withdrawal from Afghanistan, the Department of Defense on Thursday held a briefing to assure Americans it will remain present in the region, thanks to a