Articles
Unwritten Rule?: Does It Say Anywhere Chainsaws Can’t Be Used As Baseball Bats?
When I think of America’s pastime, I think of the smell of fresh ballpark food, the warm sunshine enveloping the crowd, and the roar of a serrated chainsaw blade as
MLB Considering Another Steroid Era
A memo circulating among the MLB and MLBPA this week shows baseball is considering the addition of another steroid era beginning as soon as next season. “The league is essentially
Wife Complains That Husband Spends Hours Wandering Around Target Field
Emily Moeller, a 35 year old Construction Worker, while out with some of her friends, couldn’t stop talking about her husband, Bryan. One of our sources, in Emily’s inner circle,
Kyrie Irving Salivating At Chance To Fuck Up Perfect Situation
Seldom do the stars align in professional sports for players to have the perfect opportunity to accomplish their goals. With the addition of James Harden to the Brooklyn Nets to
Massive Spike In Mets’ World Series Betting Odds Linked Back To Single Sarcastic Reddit Comment
The world of sports betting was thrown a massive curveball recently, and while the recent spike in betting on the Mets’ winning the World Series may have seemed random, research
Hear Us Out: Give PEDs To Home Plate Umpires And Let’s See How Intense Their Calls Can Get
We get it: baseball sucks. Between the slow play scattered over nine agonizing innings to the lack of muscle power from our favorite sluggers, the game needs a drastic shake
Catcher’s Mixed Signals Lead To Stolen Kiss
In an unforced error last Wednesday, Tampa Bay’s pitcher’s mixed signals to the catcher lead to a stolen kiss. “I couldn’t tell what he wanted me to do. Take it
Cubs Fans Protest COVID Trough Restrictions
Claiming it upends a longstanding tradition that many consider “the ultimate rite of pissage,” irate Chicago Cubs fans have been picketing Wrigley Field for weeks now to protest the social
The Orioles Are For Sale But Who Has $3.78 And Access To Cal Ripken’s Bones?
After 27 years of ownership, Peter Angelos is selling the Baltimore Orioles for the low low price of just $3.78 and Cal Ripken’s bones. At such a bargain price, the
Will We Ever Prioritize Safety? Ken Burns Documentary Confirms JFK Died After Being Struck By Three Foul Line Drives
A new documentary by Ken Burns confirms John F. Kennedy was killed by three foul line drives to the head, creating more demand for increased safety measures at ballparks across
‘No Murder’ And Nine Other Of Baseball’s Outdated Unwritten Rules
The MLB is desperately trying to find a way to attract new fans and improve ratings, but they’re missing the most obvious solution: Doing away with outdated unwritten rules like
Incredible: Babe Ruth Won’t Return Our Calls
Wow! No matter how many times we call baseball legend Babe Ruth, he won’t pick up. He hasn’t returned a single phone call so far. But just think: We’re talkin’
Opinion: There’s No Crying In Baseball, But I Have Many Other Bodily Fluids To Offer
Even the most fair-weather baseball fan knows the famous ‘A League of Their Own’ adage “there’s no crying in baseball.” Fortunately, even though it’s true we’re forbidden to shed tears