Articles

We Rank Stephen A. Smith’s Top 7 Personalities
Stephen A. Smith is a man of many personalities. Researchers have concluded he has 472 of them, but we used a psychologist-approved formula to narrow it down to his best

Celtics Player Patiently Explains To His Children Daddy Can’t Be With Them Christmas Morning Because He Has To Go Lose To Milwaukee
Jason Taytum has spent today’s family game night patiently explaining to his kids that he’ll miss Christmas morning again this year, as he’s needed on an important work trip to

Last-Second Shot Clinches DUI
Capping off a real nail-biter last Friday, 28-year-old Jason Fung clinched a DUI with a last-second shot. Although contested by the bartender who’d previously cut him off, Fung juked left

LeBron To Spend Offseason Rehabbing Injured Ego
After a season of hairline cracks to his confidence, sprains to his self-entitlement, and completely shredded dignity, LeBron James plans to spend this offseason rehabbing his badly injured ego. The

Top 10 Slovenian Basketball Players To Watch In This Year’s Olympics
The world is on pins and needles waiting to see what the mighty monsters of the Slovenia men’s national basketball team will do to the competition in the Olympics. Look

2021 Olympic Basketball Kicks Off With Stirring Tribute To The Many NBA Players Who Couldn’t Be Bothered To Show Up
In a touching display of affection after a difficult year, the tip-off to the 2021 Olympic Basketball tournament was preceded by a tasteful tribute to the many NBA players who

NBA Finals Prediction: Charles Barkley Enjoys Hotel Buffet
The stage is finally set for the NBA Finals, and while the series could go any way given how the playoffs have already unfolded, we’re comfortable making one bold prediction:

Does MJ At 58 Still Have What It Takes To Punch Steve Kerr?
Look, we get it. The man is 58 years old. He hasn’t played professional basketball since 2003. Decades of smoking cigars and drinking whiskey have turned him soft and doughy.

LeBron Lives Up To ‘King James’ Nickname By Releasing His Own Authorized Version Of The Bible
LeBron James announced today in a press conference held on the parapets of his new $36.75 million castle in Los Angeles that he has taken his talents to biblical scholarship

ESPN Holds Hour-Long Special For LeBron James To Announce Whether His Ankle Is Sore
In a dramatic hour-long special televised last night on ESPN, coveted Lakers superstar LeBron James redefined the NBA injured reserve landscape when he announced whether or not his ankle remains

Here’s What We Know About LeBron’s Trade Possibilities After Making Them Up
With the NBA season behind us, it’s time to ramp up the conversation around possible trades that could happen in the association, more specifically the trade rumors we made up

Basketball Geneticists Successfully Breed Wilson Basketball With Gatorade Frost
After years of interspecies cross-fertilization, basketball geneticists announced Friday that they’ve successfully bred Wilson basketballs with Gatorade Frost. The drink-ball zygote marks the single greatest leap forward in the field

Pepsi Halftime Show Finally Converts Lifelong RC Cola Drinker
In what many are calling an unprecedented win for the Pepsi brand, Dallas, Texas, resident and diehard RC Cola drinker Randy Tavarez announced that Pepsi’s famous Halftime show had thoroughly
