Quotes
“New season, new goals–this year we’re biting dicks.”
–Dan Campbell, Detroit Lions Head Coach
December 12, 2023
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“Uhh… no thanks.”
–Sam Darnold, when asked if he’d like to play as himself in Madden’s Career Mode
December 12, 2023
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“There is no ‘I’ in ‘team,’ but there’s a lot of ‘I’s’ in ‘fucking idiot’ you motherfucking idiot.”
–Nick Saban
December 12, 2023
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“Honestly, no one should ever play football. It’s terrible for your body.”
–Tom Brady, on his first day as a Fox Sports analyst
December 12, 2023
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“Sure, I’ve fucked big-blonde-boobed Dallas whores. But honestly, I think more about those big-blonde-boobed Dallas whores that fucked me.”
–Jerry Jones, closing words to University of Texas graduating class
December 12, 2023
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“I know what you’re wondering, and yes, the curtains do match the drapes.”
–Mark Davis, Las Vegas Raiders owner
December 12, 2023
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“Play your cards right, kid, and this could all be yours someday.”
–Joe Flacco, showing Zach Wilson his model train collection
December 12, 2023
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“It’s confusing because they make you play on the wrong side of the field.”
–Rob Gronkowski, on London NFL games
December 12, 2023
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