BASEBALL

“It’ll be nice to have something entertaining there.”
-Cubs Fan, on concerts returning to Wrigley Field

“Anyone who dies will get a bobblehead made in their image.”
-Rob Manfred, convincing MLB stadium staff to return to work

Mets Acquire Yankees For $1.2 Trillion
People say, “If you can’t beat ’em, join ’em.” Well, the New York Mets just proved Monday that you might be able to “buy ’em.” Yes, the Mets struck a

Report: Sandy Koufax Voted For Kamala—Does That Help?
Hey Harris fans. So, we bet you’re feeling down in the dumps this week. Between people laughing about “owning the Libs” on TikTok, to hearing your cousin in Oregon swear

Rays To Rebuild Tropicana Field Just In Time For 2026 Hurricanes
After enduring what officials deemed “significant but repairable” structural damage to Tropicana Field during Hurricane Milton, the Tampa Bay Rays front office said in a statement on Friday that the

Milwaukee Brewers Wondering If There’s Some Magical Beverage That Can Help Them Forget Playoff Loss
After last night’s crushing season-ending loss, players on the Milwaukee Brewers were reportedly scouring their refrigerators wondering if, please God, there’s something they can drink to take the edge off.

5 Things To Know Before You Don’t Watch The World Series
The groundswell, desire, and anticipation for the October Classic has reached null critical mass with the Yankees-Dodgers World Series kicking off tonight! In what promises to be 4-to-7 games void

Top 5 Times Mr. Met Got Away With Vehicular Manslaughter
Look. We know what you’re thinking. It’s time to celebrate the Mets – they’re in the playoffs and have a chance! Our good conscience couldn’t stand idly by. And sure,

Hurry Up! The White Sox Are Giving Free Copper Piping To The First 200 Fans At Today’s Game
Step right up! Step right up! Come have some southside copper piping! Feel like a loser? So do we! In fact, over a hundred times over, so here’s some copper

Pardon Our Delay: George Steinbrenner – Rest In Peace – (1930-2010)
For fourteen years, we have neglected to acknowledge the passing of New York Yankees owner George Steinbrenner. In doing so, we have misled our readers about Mr. Steinbrenner. Sports Riot






