BASKETBALL
“They just go into each other like nesting dolls.”
-Ernie Johnson on how Kenny, Charles, and Shaq spend the offseason
Player’s Future Uncertain Due To Injuries And Laws Of The Universe
After suffering a devastating achilles tear during the NBA Finals and continuing to be bound by the laws of nature, Kevin Durant’s future in the league is anything but certain.
Long Live The King: Gym Teacher Wows Class By Dunking On Nine-Foot Hoop
Second-grade students ran wild in disbelief after seeing legendary gym teacher Mr. Salisbury put on an unforgettable spectacle by jamming home a towering, show-stopping nine-foot dunk during this morning’s gym
James Harden, Russell Westbrook Enjoying Final Months Of Friendship Before The Season Gets Serious
From being spotted around town on their tandem bicycle to reportedly always going halvesies on their fries, Russell Westbrook and James Harden are making the most of their summer friendship
Hilarious: Shaq Goes Undercover In This Video But Everyone Immediately Knows It’s Him And Are Too Nice To Say So
A hilarious video is making the rounds on the internet this week featuring Shaquille O’Neal undercover trying to trick fans; but despite that it is obviously Shaq everyone just nicely
Owner’s Dying Wish Is To See Team Make Him A Crap-Ton Of Money One Last Time
Speaking privately to his dearest business associates and employees in his Willis Tower penthouse this Thursday, ailing Chicago Bull’s majority owner, Jerry Reinsdorf, expressed a deep felt desire to see
Astros Heartbroken After Misinterpreting Stolen Signals
The Houston Astros suffered a painful organizational defeat this week after realizing the signals they had recorded from their opponents were misinterpreted, and that the other team is not, in
American Athletes Unsure What To Do With Hands During Canadian National Anthem
The NBA has a problem on its hands, or rather with their players’ hands, the issue being that American players are unsure of what to do with their hands during
Investigation: What Other Sun Is Phoenix Playing For?
The Phoenix Suns organization must answer a fundamental question to be considered a legitimate player in cosmic sports: What other suns are they playing for? As a monosunistic culture, the
