LESSER SPORTS
Winner of Underwater Breath-Holding Competition Remembered as Hero
Neighbors and loved ones gathered poolside at the Warren County Recreational Center on Saturday to pay respects to local sports hero, Ryan Griffiths, 13, who won the 4th Annual US
Dad Comes Alive During Sports Section Of Trivial Pursuit
Suddenly taking interest in the match after zoning out during the first hour and a half of the National Trivial Pursuit Championship, this Thursday local dad Patrick Gilson propelled his
Suspicious New Tour De France Route Includes Path Through Steroid Factory
The illustrious Tour De France is underway once again and showing why it’s still the tour de force of cycling, though this year, some have found it suspicious that this
MLS Commissioner: “We Need At Least Twenty More People Watching For This To Be Worth It”
After attracting a record-breaking thirteen fans per game in the past two seasons, the nation’s favorite professional male-only American soccer league is in financial ruin. “We need at least twenty
Boxer Takes Issue With All Opponent’s Life Experiences Thus Far
During the press conference for the upcoming WBO Cruiserweight Title Bout, challenger Torrey Hawkins voiced his disapproval for each and every one of champion Rueben Flores’ life experiences. Hawkins proceeded
Genius Comedian, Provocateur Calls Sports “Sportsball”
Stand-up comic Jake Tauer absolutely skewered the wild world of sports during his set Saturday night when he referred to all athletic competitions as “sportsball.” The ever-enlightened social satirist completely
Goliath Still Trying To Live Down Only Loss
Although nearly 3,000 years have passed since he last took the battlefield, Goliath, former Champion of the Philistines, is still haunted by the ghosts of his biblically infamous loss in
Alabama Outlaws Gay Wrestling
Voting to remove the toxic influence of homosexuality from its proud sports culture, the Alabama legislature today unanimously approved a bill to outlaw all gay wrestling. “This historic legislation is
