FOOTBALL

NFL To Put All 257 Draftees On Suicide Watch Ahead Of Goodell Announcing, “The Carolina Panthers Select…”

“The goal of good broadcasting is to remain completely unbiased. Which is something those smooth-brained Packers fans will never be able to understand.”
–Troy Aikman

“Every line on a football field has a twin. Except, that is, for the fifty-yard line. Did I just blow your mind?”
–Aaron Rodgers, to seven consecutive first dates

Here Are Four Bold Predictions For This Year’s NFL Season And One Weak, Spineless One
The NFL season is in full swing, and the football minds at Sports Riot have compiled four completely outrageous predictions. These predictions aren’t just bold, they’re italicized, underlined, and BOLD-bold. And

Opinion: I Could Have Made That Play
With the game on the line in the fourth quarter, my favorite NFL team tried to execute what should have been a simple play: The quarterback tries to QB sneak

Antonio Brown Out 4-6 Weeks With Dislocated Thoughts
The injuries are piling up this NFL season, and sadly the Buccaneers’ Antonio Brown appears to be no exception, as reports indicate the veteran wide receiver will be sidelined for

Mike Richards Hired As New Packers Quarterback
This former game show host is the new Green Bay Packers starting quarterback: Who is Mike Richards? After a months-long process to find the next Packers quarterback, the organization selected

Is Your Child Addicted To NFL Redzone?
It’s a parent’s worst nightmare. You walk into your child’s room. It’s dark. They haven’t left in days, and you find them under their Raiders blanket, strung out from a

Jaguars Fans Swear If Trevor Lawrence Wins A Super Bowl He’ll Never Have To Pay For Bag Of Meth In Jacksonville
Jacksonville fans made a promise to Trevor Lawrence this past weekend that if the rookie QB wins the team a Super Bowl, he will never again have to pay for

Ranking NFC East Fanbases From Completely Insufferable To Adorably Violent
The NFC East is the worst. The teams, the coaches, and most importantly, the fans. We’ve ranked them from completely insufferable all the way to adorably violent. Completely Insufferable—NY

New Report Shows Millennial Quarterbacks Possess Only 5% As Much Wealth As Boomer Esiason
A new study released this week from the NFL’s Economic Policy Institute has pinpointed an alarming trend, showing that today’s Millennial quarterbacks possess only a fraction of the wealth of





