FOOTBALL
Caleb Williams’ Early Success: Inspires Bears Fan To Finally Leave Chicago, Make Something Of His Life
“I just close my eyes, take a deep breath, and think of a baby crying on an airplane.”
–Justin Tucker, “visualizing” before field goal attempts
“Even after all these years, I still get Alabama and Michigan mixed up.”
–Urban Meyer, on which campus frat quad he’s not allowed back at
“My entire team tested negative for cocaine. I’ve… failed them all.”
–Mark Davis, stepping down as Las Vegas Raiders Owner effective immediately
“Tush Push” And 5 Other NFL Plays That Describe Your Pathetic Sex Life
Football, like sex, is a lot more fun when you can actually convert and make it into the end zone. And while the Tush Push might have a 92% success
Dick Sucking: Should We Add It To Football?
Like most Americans, we’ve been thinking a lot about how to improve the NFL and the game we love. And it got us thinking: Should we add dick-sucking to football?
Zach Wilson To Star in ’80 For Brady’ Porn Parody
Despite the recent benching to 3rd-string backup quarterback, Zach Wilson isn’t letting anything stop him from pursuing his dreams. Citing his deep affinity for the original, the Jets quarterback surprised
Help! Aaron Rodgers Is Bored And Won’t Stop DMing Us ‘Alien Autopsy’ Highlights
With the Jets season over, when we at Sports Riot got our first DM from Aaron Rodgers, we were stoked. But what we first saw as a blessing, soon turned
Baltimore Man Correctly Living In Fear That Ray Lewis Could Be Around Any Corner
Like most Baltimore residents, Beau Robinson makes a point to be indoors before nightfall, correctly fearing that Ray Lewis could be lurking around any and every corner. According to Baltimore
Aaron Rodgers Announces Plans To Astral-Project Into Tim Boyle’s Body
Saying he has a “contingency plan” if his healing timeline does not pan out, injured Jets superstar Aaron Rodgers held a press conference on Tuesday to announce that he intended
Opinion: Switch Pucks And Footballs For One Wild Weekend
Most sports fans can agree that football and hockey have become stale. Hitting a puck with a stick? Yawn. Throwing a football? Snooze city. However, there is a way to
Opinion: If The NFL Were So Concerned About Concussions, They Would Eliminate Heads From The Game
Every now and again, the NFL pretends to care about the mountains of evidence showing that repeated blows to the head cause brain trauma. I’m sick of their virtue signaling.
