FOOTBALL

Prediction: 18 Teams We Know Won’t Win Any Playoff Games
We here at Sports Riot aren’t much in the prognostication business. But today, you’re in luck. This Divisional Playoff Round we got on lock. Not only did we know the Texans would lose, we also know who else won’t win, GUARANTEED. Here are 18 of’em: Minnesota Vikings – Their poor playoff performance could be explained […]

Breaking: Aaron Rodgers Opts Out Of Playoffs
Yesterday launched the opening round of the NFL playoffs, but this year a familiar face is notably absent: Aaron Rodgers. Why? And why isn’t anybody talking about it? Sports Riot took the case. We caught up with Rodgers in his $9.5M wilderness retreat in Montclair, New Jersey, and asked: Would he miss quarterbacking a game […]

Aaron Rodgers Celebrates Miraculous Victory, Despite Jets Loss
Aaron Rodgers, 4-time MVP, 1-time Super Bowl Winner, and potential GOAT quarterback posted another miraculous victory to add to his Hall of Fame career, amidst a Jets loss. “It’s really unbelievable I can pull it out and get a ‘Rod-win’, despite the team’s terrible performance,” Rodgers explained to the Press post-game. Opposing (Seattle) media further […]

“It’s an honor to be a leader, and I take my role very seriously.”
–Josh Allen, on becoming a mod of the Dragon Ball Z subreddit

“When I fired Bill, he pulled out his hip sword and tried to commit seppuki.”
–Robert Kraft, terminating Bill Belichick

“I don’t own the Cowboys. All of America does! But, yes, I do own all the players.”
–Jerry Jones

Andy Reid Out 2-4 Weeks With Chicken Tenderitis
Shocking news out of the Kansas City Chiefs’ organization this morning. Head coach Andy Reid has announced he’s on injured reserve with a 3-4 week expected recovery time with the

Tua Tagovailoa One Concussion Away From US Senate
Tua Tagovailoa was concussed and knocked out of the Bills/Dolphins game last night. A scary scene with many asking the question, “Should he hang it up for good?” Others in-the-know

Lock Up Your Sons: Virginia McCaskey Is Going Off Birth Control
BREAKING: Chicago Bears owner and longtime Chi-Town starlet Virginia McCaskey has announced in a press conference that she will be no-longer on birth control. “I’ve decided, I want to start

How To Protect Yourself And Home During A Raiders Away Game
You’ve got the dip, you’ve got the drinks, but… are you prepared for the national security threat Raiders fans pose to your home? Got a gun – HA! Good luck!

Quiz: Which Green Bay Professional Sports Team Are You?
Green Bay is a LEGENDARY sports town. In fact, they call it “Title Town.” But which of their pro sports teams best defines you? Take our quiz. 1. Do you

Where Is He Now?: Patrick Mahomes
Patrick. Mahomes. Remember that name? Gosh. It feels like yesterday when the star studded QB of KC was on my tv every Sunday. But sadly, time passes. Despite it FEELING

‘Hard Knocks’ Finale Will Show Bears Fans Were In Purgatory All Along
WARNING: The following content contains SPOILERS. HBO leaked information Monday about its Season 21 finale of Hard Knocks: Chicago Bears. Lead director Shannon Furman told sources that the final minutes

ESPN To Add “Would Fuck” Feature To Fantasy Football App
Due to extreme demand from fantasy players, owners, and developers, ESPN reportedly will add a “would f*ck” feature to their fantasy football app. “Fans know the stats. But what about


