Man With JetPack Shatters Pole Vault World Record By 2,080 Feet
During a dramatic track-and-field World Championship last weekend, Russian star Boris “the Falcon” Sokolov shattered the pole vault world record by a stunning 2,080 feet. Sokolov soared well over the
What Ace Ventura: Pet Detective Got Wrong About Kidnapping Dan Marino
How many could we list? A lowly local pet detective would have access to Dan Marino like that? These kidnappers were found by a guy with that hair? The kidnappers’
Top Three Things “The Last Dance” Got Wrong About Michael Jordan’s Steakhouse
While providing riveting behind-the-scenes footage from the Bulls’ ’97-’98 season, “The Last Dance” showed clear bias toward the inner workings of Michael Jordan’s Steakhouse. Here are the top three things
Sport Illustrated KIDS: Swimsuit Edition Pulled From Shelves
After one of the most catastrophic PR miscalculations in recent history, Sports Illustrated KIDS has decided to pull their child-themed Swimsuit edition in response to public outrage.⠀ The issue’s content,
TCU Rules ‘Man-To-Man’ Defense An Affront To God
In a surprise ruling, this Tuesday TCU athletic director Jeremiah Donati has decreed that all forms of man-to-man defense are an abomination in the eyes of God. “When God revealed
Fuck It: Lions Punt on First Down
After winning the opening coin toss and electing to receive the ball the Lions immediately went into punt formation and returned the ball to the opposition, a play they repeated
Man Explaining Onside Kicks Must Be Crushing First Date
Romantic prospect analysts are reporting that local bachelor Jeffrey Dodson is absolutely crushing his first date with a woman through his detailed explanation of onside kicks and effective strategies. According
Here’s A List Of The Cowardly MLB Players Unwilling To Die For Your Entertainment
With the MLB set to move into the playoffs and the season well underway, most fans and athletes are chomping at the bit for more and more baseball. However, some
Game Changer: Wide Receiver Has Secret Football Hidden In His Socks
The game of football was forever changed Sunday when Falcons wide receiver Clark Thompson used a secret football he had hidden in his socks to score the game-winning touchdown. The
