Hear Us Out: Pee Wee UFC
Sports are wonderful activities for kids. However, one youth sport seems to be absent in America: a professional, organized, Dana White-led UFC for 9-12 year-olds. Pee Wee UFC would do
Empty Net A Real Slut
According to rumors circulated and later confirmed by Stephanie, the new talk of the Minnesota Wild’s Xcel Energy Center is the opposing team’s hockey net, which has scandalized the entire
If The NFL Cares So Much About Safety, Then Why Don’t Players Wear Seatbelts?
We all know that playing in an NFL game is like a car crash, but that begs the question: If the NFL cares so much about safety and well-being of
Fourteen More Jets Players Retroactively Opt Out Of 2020 NFL Season
On the grounds that the 2020 NFL season is nothing more than an imaginary thought exercise despite it still “continuing” into the “playoffs,” fourteen additional Jets players have joined a
Derrick Henry Apologizes For Derailing Train During Morning Jog
Speaking for the first time since the Titans playoff elimination this past weekend, Derrick Henry addressed questions regarding Henry absentmindedly derailing a commuter train during his morning jog. The Tennessee
Drew Brees Takes A Breather While Taysom Hill Bangs His Wife
As a gadget quarterback, Taysom Hill has been used in a variety of different ways throughout his career. This season, however, the Saints have had to get creative in order
Overrated? Patrick Mahomes Hasn’t Even Won Seven Super Bowls
Patrick Mahomes has been talked about in high terms, even getting called by some in the media the Greatest Quarterback of All Time. However, when you look at the numbers,
Think You Have What It Takes To Play In The NFL? Well, You Don’t.
We see you out there, with your 5:00 am kale smoothies and nonstop hype track featuring Jay-Z’s “Run This Town” eight times in a row. We know how slick you
Dick Butkus On Changing HIs Name From “Phallus Assmooch”
Dick Butkus, testy after years of ridicule for being shafted by an unfortunate name, has decided to officially change his name to Phallus Assmooch. “Whenever I was penetrating the hole,
