Dak Prescott Predicts NFC Championship Run, NFL Reviewing Film For Severe Hit To Head
The blue tent is coming out early this year for Cowboys gunslinger Dak Prescott. After announcing to reporters that America’s Team is “primed for a deep playoff run,” the QB
Bears Fan Dies From Either Broken Or Clogged Heart
Last Sunday, Chicago Bears superfan Brian “Jowls” Wishnowski peacefully passed on to that great Lou Malnati’s in the sky. Autopsy results were inconclusive, revealing that the lifelong Soldier Field regular
Conspiracy Theorist Thinks Andrew Luck Could Still Be Alive
It’s been nearly 2,000 days since former QB Andrew Luck was last seen, sprouting many theories as to his whereabouts. Our source, who chooses to be anonymous due to fear
This Day In Sports History: Manti Te’o’s Imaginary Girlfriend Loses Courageous Battle With Imaginary Leukemia
On this day in 2012, a day of imaginary tragedy, Manti Te’o lost his beloved imaginary girlfriend to the ravages of imaginary leukemia. Her imaginary heroism inspired Te’o both on
Jalen Carter Says Spitting On Dak Prescott Was ‘The Worst Thing He’s Ever Done,’ So Don’t Bother Googling Him Or Anything
On opening night, Eagles DT Jalen Carter was ejected from competition for what Carter is calling, “The worst thing I’ve ever done in my life, period. No further investigation needed.”
Sources: The Busts At Canton Come Alive At Night And They Won’t Stop Using Racial Slurs
Officials at the Pro Football Hall of Fame are investigating a bizarre phenomenon in which bronze busts of former NFL legends appear to come alive after hours—and IMMEDIATELY begin shouting
RFK Jr. Calling On NFL To Ban Helmets In Favor Of Locally Sourced Organic Ingredients
Secretary of Health and Human Services Robert F. Kennedy Jr. called for a top-down ban on football helmets Wednesday, saying there was no proof that such “head-inoculations” protect players from
Jim Harbaugh Shows Team What It Means To Be A Charger By Hooking Car Battery To Nipples
Standing shirtless in the facility’s parking prior to Friday’s Chiefs/Chargers matchup, Head Coach Jim Harbaugh attached car battery clamps to his nipples in order to demonstrate to his team what
Trump Reminds Foreign Tennis Stars ‘U.S. Open’ Just The Name Of The Tournament
Donald Trump clarified today that the U.S. Open is exactly what it sounds like: a tennis tournament. Nothing more, nothing less. Speaking to reporters outside the White House, Trump reminded
